What is the greatest fear of an introvert?

You're welcome to join us.

It does sound like a good offer and it is. However, if you're an introvert and you like to leave when you've had enough, you might already be thinking about how much the fare home would cost.

Since you're aware of what might happen, you intend to leave at eight o'clock. Your friend, however, would like to stay until ten. At that point, the idea comes up of getting some food, and as a result you end up eating french fries at a table surrounded by other people, thinking all the time about the perfectly good left-overs in your refrigerator.

The number one everyday nightmare for introverts is finding themselves in a social situation with no simple way of getting out of it, particularly since leaving would require you to give a reason for saying that you've had enough.

You wanted to see your friends and you also wanted to go home one day, apparently meaning that the latter point should have been mentioned earlier.

When a quick visit stops being quick

There is a substantial difference between agreeing to do something and realizing what it is that you have actually agreed to.

The idea of having a quiet meal with a friend sounds appealing, but when you get there and find that they have invited six people you don't know, the evening takes on a completely different character. Instead of being able to catch up with them as you had hoped, you now have to introduce yourself while everyone is listening to some music that no one appears to want to switch off.

Or you agree to drop in for a minute. Then your friend places their keys on the counter, takes off their shoes, and gets themselves comfortable on the couch.

That doesn't look like a minute.

For an introvert who enjoys knowing what to expect, the unpleasant thing is seeing a reasonable plan become open-ended. You had planned for one type of evening and now have to work out how to cope with a different one.

A reason why an introvert may hesitate about agreeing to an invitation is that they recall the previous instance in which a simple plan ended up having a number of additional elements.

The awkward part is trying to leave

You've had fun, you've managed to get to know others, and you've now reached the stage at which going home sounds better than any other option currently available.

So you grab your jacket.

“You’re leaving already?”

There it is.

The simple decision you've just made to go home has suddenly turned into a conversation. One person asks whether you're upset, while another insists that you should stay for one more drink. You begin to explain your schedule for tomorrow, as if your leaving needs to be backed up by evidence.

At the same time, your friend is saying farewell to a person near the door. That's a positive sign. The only exception is that the farewell turns into a discussion about their kitchen renovation. Then they remember that they had meant to ask someone in the room across the way.

Then you placed your jacket back over your arm.

If this seems familiar, then perhaps the source of your fear is the entire process of leaving without making anyone feel rejected; you're tired, you'd like some peace, and in some way you're responsible for ensuring that everyone feels okay about it.

Sometimes you get home and the conversation follows you

You finally get back. Take off your shoes and put on some comfortable clothes. While you're halfway through deciding what to watch your phone suddenly flashes.

The group chat is asking you why you left.

Next are the photographs, the voice messages, and a new schedule for tomorrow. You haven't even got over today's plan yet.

Having your phone available can give the impression that the evening never really ends. If this situation sounds particularly familiar, then our Guide on How Group Chats Are a Second Job looks at the pressure involved in keeping up when you actually want to put your phone down.

That's why the mute button is so frequently used.

You can be done before everyone else

The difficult point is that it's possible to enjoy yourself and yet be prepared for its conclusion.

It is possible to laugh during dinner, to enjoy spending time with a friend, and at the same time to want the rest of the night to be alone; leaving does not nullify the part that you enjoyed.

It's a good idea to include the ending in your plan. If you say "I'd love to come, but I'm leaving around eight" you give people a clear idea of what to expect. Moreover, if you travel there yourself, you can leave without having to spend half an hour watching someone else say goodbye.

When you're ready to leave, all you need to say is 'I had a good time. I'm going home' and that's the entire explanation; there's no need to come up with an early appointment in order to make a quiet evening seem reasonable.

People can become used to your pace and you can get used to stating it without having to apologies for doing so.

For the days when it gets too peopley

No Crowd Clothing is well familiar with this kind of thing since we produce clothing for introverts in those situations when you know precisely how you feel and prefer not to go into a long explanation.

The hoodie that we have called Our It’s Too Peopley really captures the atmosphere well, particularly in the situation where the "small get-together" has somehow managed to fill up all the rooms in the house.

The same kind of humor is behind our introvert T-shirts: a thought you've had a hundred times, now something you can wear. Whenever you see it, you know at once which friend would laugh since they've seen you standing by the door with your keys.

Put on what makes you feel like yourself and enjoy the people you've come to see.

If you already intend to leave early, then go and get your own car.